Tests are all over which is a huge sign of relief. But the terror part of receiving the outcome of tests is terrifying. Previously, I know that even if I don't do well the outcome wouldn't be so bad. But now is all a different story. It is an extreme case and the effect of demoralization is 10 times worse. It is here where the catch-up effect theory doesn't work and my system is ever facing diminishing returns. What I need is a system that produces increasing returns. I hate the feeling of entering another battlefield after this break but I know I must repeat this viscious cycle for 7 more times. Things never come that easy too.

Anyway, my desktop crashes and all my hamster pictures are gone. I tried to save my dying compt for one whole day but only managed to recover some files. Fancy it crashing after all my tests..which is obviously a good thing. What is the worst nightmare..for me it is when your compt died at the 'unglamarous' moment.

Recently, I had many strange dreams and encounters and are all to do with men. Ok, I am not been lecherous or unfaithful here but it just came. First, was the dream of you marrying bro and I was the bridemaid. It was such a happy ending. If only it had happened and bro would really be my brother and I would be driven by a nice car for life..I mean bro is really a nice guy but too bad he's too old. Next, is my ex-crush in sec school. lol~ oOps fancy revealing that I had a crush during my younger days. I saw him across the traffic light 2 weeks ago and I saw him below my flats walking to the bus stop few days back. Although I only saw his side-view, I am sure it's him lo. And one of my neighbour even talked to him. Don't tell me he has moved into the same block as me and he's the relative of my neighbour? It's not the first time though..he and I were in the same OG camp during the first 3 months in jjc and same tuition group for 2 years too. Anyway my puppy love was for 4 years..can you imagine I was silly enough to be magnetised to this foolish game for 4 years. bleahz~

And talking about the recent Mumbai attack. My hearts goes out to the Singapore family who lost their daughter during the bloodshed. The other siblings mentioned that it takes time to sink in. But I am sure life would never be the same again cuz it is as if they have all lost part of their identities. Just like what John Donne said: Each man's death diminishes me, for I am involved in mankind.

Bless the world and let's remove such hatred and unnecesarry bloodshed. It's just saddening to see people snatching other innocent lives. Let the grim reaper do so instead.